Vacation Homes, Jail or Death.

Today I bought my first lottery ticket. I’ve been saying for as long as I can remember that I need to win the lottery (I could also get a job at JCrew for the discount, but who wants to work for their money?) and today I finally took a step toward having my millions. To be fair, I never would have done this on my own, but after lunch today I said I needed a coffee and Kindra said she needed a lotto ticket… we got both.

Now we’ve been talking about what we’re going to buy with all of our money. First things first – champagne to celebrate… that’s a gimme. And, I’ll probably need a relaxing day at the spa to think through the rest of my purchases. I’ll give some money to my family. Do I give money to friends or do I just pay whenever we go out? Do I buy a practical first house or the house of my dreams? Do I buy that vacation home right away? Do I buy a weekday car and a weekend car or is everyday the weekend when you’re a millionaire? When I start traveling the world do I take people with me?

It’s hard to decide because the thing is, each of these expenditures comes with its own set of problems… how deep into the family do I go passing out money? Immediate family only? Aunts and uncles? Do I have to give to all of the cousins or can I just pick my favorites? And these friendly dinners I’ve been paying for… how long am I willing to pay for my friends before I start to feel resentful that they never even pretend to reach for their wallets? Maybe they should pay for their own meals and I’ll just let them use the vacation houses whenever they want. Are people going to think I’m a snob if I drive around in my new custom-built Porsche everyday?

I think statistics say that 70-something percent of people who win the lottery end up either in jail or dead. Considering how many people I’ve already upset by giving money to one cousin and not another, by no longer paying for dinners out, and by driving a nicer car than you I can see why this might happen. I’m very excited about my lottery ticket, but I’m a little bit worried about the prospect of actually winning.



Filed under entries about nothing

3 responses to “Vacation Homes, Jail or Death.

  1. kb

    I didn’t win! 😦 I guess there’s always next week!

  2. aditi

    this blog rocks.

  3. Hallie

    I feel obligated to tell you that 100% of the people who win the lottery end up dead. And so do 100% of the people that don’t. That’s a little thing I call PERSPECTIVE.

    You’re welcome!

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